My Sister's Daughter - Chapter 10 - The Accident

The bus ride was a blur. I was too numb to realize that I was home. Still in a daze, I opened the front door and felt the emptiness surround me. How had I stayed here, all alone, for so long?

I shook my head to clear the negative thoughts. I could get through this.

I made myself a pot of tea to calm my nerves and settled down in my favorite sofa. I wish my sister was here.. She always knew what to do. She was my one stop for advice on relationships, clothes, career.. Everything.

I sat there, recounting the last call she had made to me, or to anyone else for that matter..

She had sounded so happy. They were driving down to meet my parents. It was a glorious morning and my brother in law had stopped to stretch his legs when my sister called me.

She had called to coax me into joining them and as usual, I was giving excuses. I was too busy to be spending time with family. I needed to focus on my career.

“Oh come on Khushi.. Just come over the weekend. Its been so long since we’ve seen you!”

I had smiled then, not knowing, that I was never going to see her again.

“Don’t exaggerate Di.. we met two months ago.” I used to call my sister that Di  short for Didi..

My sister had laughed then, her contagious laugh cracking me up too.

“Khushi.. I..” Suddenly I heard my sister scream, “Oh my God! No!”

A loud crash followed my sister’s scream and then nothing.

“Didi?!” I remember trying to control the panic in my voice. “Di is everything okay?” I had pressed my ear to the phone hoping to hear some sound.

“Khushi…” My sister’s words were no more than a gasp. “He’s gone Khushi.. Pia’s gone.. Both of them..” My sister was crying uncontrollably.

“Where are you Di? Are you hurt? I’ll send help.. Tell me exactly where you are..” I had remained calm, asking all the right questions.

“Don’t move a muscle Di. I’m going to call for help now.. Ok??” I doubt my sister heard that.. All I could hear was her wailing. I had desperately called all the hospitals in my parents town, giving them my sister’s location. I could do nothing but wait. Then, my sister had called.

“Khushi.. I’m hurt.. There’s blood all over.. I can’t tell if its mine..” I had calmed her down then, begging her not to panic and that help was on its way. I could sense my sister float in and out of consciousness. My conversation was the only thing that was keeping her in the conscious state.

“Talk to me..” I told her. I had to keep her talking..

 She told me some car had crashed into theirs. And theirs in turn had rammed a tree. She and my brother-in-law, who were outside had taken the full impact of the crash against the tree. My brother-in-law was unconscious, so was Pia..

“They are gone Khushi..” It was almost as though my sister had lost her will to live.

I had spoken non-stop about crazy unrelated things, for the sake of invoking a response from her. Then finally, after about half an hour, the reactions had stopped coming in. I had continued talking, in the hopes that she would respond.

She didn’t.  

“Di… Wake up Di.. Please..” I had begged her to get up.. I had held the phone in my hands, staring at it when I had heard Pia.. I remember the relief that had flooded through me on hearing Pia's voice. 

Pia’s crying could be heard clearly through the phone and I screamed into the phone, hoping Pia would hear me.. She did.

“Pia.. Are you ok? Is Di ok?” I didn’t ask about my brother-in-law. I didn’t want Pia to see what my sister had described.

“Mommy is.. ” Pia was sobbing.. “Mommy is not talking…”

And then I had heard the sirens.. Some paramedic  had come on the phone and informed me that they were talking all three of them to the hospital.  I had called my parents as I had rushed out of my house and told them what had happened.  I skipped out the gory details.


In the bus, I had closed my eyes tightly and  prayed, as I have never prayed before..

I was praying that they all were alright and that they were just unconscious.

I had been so wrong.

Once I reached, I was greeted with a crowd outside my house. Nobody was looking me in the eye and right there, I had understood that I had lost my sister forever.

Even as people offered their condolences to me, I could hear my sister’s scream replaying in my head. I could sense the panic, the fear, the anguish behind my sister’s scream. Each time I entered the house, the sound amplified until I couldn’t take it anymore. I had left the next day, after ensuring that Pia was in good hands.

For six months I had been tormented by nightmares. Each night I received the call from my sister and replayed it differently. Every night, I couldn’t save her.

That night, I had the same dream again and this time I managed to save her. I reached the hospital and saw Pia next to a bed, holding a woman’s hand. I had walked faster, eager to see my sister, but the woman in the bed, was not my sister. It was me.

My Sister's Daughter - Chapter 9 - The Difficult Choice

I stood stunned. For a moment Pia’s reply didn’t even register in my head.

My mum reacted before me.

“Pia!” She cried and started to run behind her. I put my hand on her shoulder and stopped her.

“Let her go ma..”

My mum tried to make excuses for Pia’s reaction,  “Let me explain to her Khushi. Maybe she just misunderstood you. I’m sure about it.”

I smiled. I was hurt by Pia’ answer, but not surprised. Last night I had asked myself the same question. I had tried to put myself in Pia’s shoes and tried to think about it from her point of view. Each time, I had come up with the same answer.

“I don’t want to press her. Its her decision, and I’m going to respect that.”

“And what are you going to do Khushi?” My dad asked. Both my parents had a hopeful look on their face.

I had thought about this question too last night. About what I would do, if Pia refused to come with me. Would I leave everything that I loved, that I had worked so hard for? It had been a difficult decision. Obviously, the right thing to do would have been to give up everything and stay with Pia.. But I wasn’t a saint, my life meant something to me. Call it selfish, call it whatever. But ten years down the line, I didn’t want to blame Pia, if my life didn’t turn out the way I had wanted it to be.

Of course, I would try and come visit her as often as possible, but apart from that, there was nothing much I could do to help Pia. As for my own demons, I would have to find another way to get rid of them. But I could not, for anyone’s sake, throw away everything I had.

“I’m going home..” I knew I was inviting my parents wrath. But they had to understand, they had to! I wasn’t ready to give up everything I cherished. I felt horrible about it, but why was I expected to sacrifice my job, my freedom, my ambitions??

My father surprised me, “Its ok Khushi.. Whatever you decide, we’ll always support you and love you.” He squeezed my shoulder.

“Oh, dad.. I didn’t know how you’d react..” I was so grateful that they were okay with my decision.

“Khushi.. ” He cupped my face in his hands like he used to when I was a little child, “We are not going to judge you based on your decision.”

My eyes welled up.. I covered my face with my hands trying to hide the tears from my parents. My father gently pulled my hands apart and wiped my tears away.

“Promise me, you’ll visit us often..” My dad’s grave eyes looked deep into mine. I think, he wanted me to visit more often to ensure that I was ok, rather than the other way around.

I laughed a little, I had come here to help my family out and all I had done was adding to their problems.

“I promise.. ” I flashed a quick smile at my mum..

“Well.. I guess there’s nothing more I can do here.. ” I started walking away.

“Khushi…”  My mum interrupted.. “If possible, talk to Pia before you go..” It was a request that I could not refuse.

I nodded and went to look for Pia.. She wasn’t anywhere in the house. I stepped outside into the garden, there I found her on the guava tree. Perched on a branch, holding a book.. That used to be my hiding place when I was younger. The branch was a place where I could sit for hours and not have anyone disturb me.. I walked towards the tree.

“Pia.. Come down Pia..” I called.

Pia  looked at me with troubled eyes. “I’m not mad at you Pia..” I reassured her. Pia didn’t look at me. She shifted ever so slightly, such that there was little place for me beside her on the branch.

I didn’t know whether the branch would take my weight now. Regardless, I started climbing and made my way to the branch.

“You mind?” I asked her before sitting next to her.

She shook her head in response. We sat there in silence.

Finally I broke the silence, “I have to go now Pia..” Pia didn’t react.

“You’ll call me?” No reaction. Pia was giving me the silent treatment. I didn’t know how to deal with her. I pecked her on her forehead and got off the tree. I walked back briskly to the house. I had to get out now, otherwise I would never leave. I dumped all my stuff in a bag, bade farewell to my parents promising to return as soon as possible.

As I approached the gate, I turned back to take one last look at the house. I saw something move and for a moment I thought it was Pia.. But I was mistaken, it was just a shadow. I smiled at my foolishness and without a second glance, walked away.

My Sister's Daughter - Chapter 8 - Pia's Decision

Pia smiled in her sleep and turned over. I sighed, it would have to wait till tomorrow. I kissed her on her forehead and went to my room.

Sleep was the last thing on my mind. I lay there on the bed, thinking how my life was about to change. The thought didn’t scare me anymore. I guess that’s a good thing.

I tossed around the bed, trying to find a comfortable spot. Finally, exasperated, I sat up in the bed. I was wondering what to do when I heard footsteps coming towards my room. The door opened and Pia entered clutching her blanket.

“Why are you still awake baby? Did something wake you?” I asked

“Can I sleep here?” Pia asked, yawning.

“Of course, you can.”

Pia climbed on to the bed and snuggled in besides me. Within minutes she was asleep.

I stayed up, running my hand through her hair for a long time. The only sound I could hear was Pia’s deep even breathing and eventually, I felt sleep envelope me.

I woke up early the next morning. Pia had made herself quite comfortable in my bed. I was almost on the edge, a little further and I would have been on the floor. I tried to get up, when I felt a little hand on me. In her sleep, Pia had put her arm around me. I lifted her arm carefully. Pia stirred, but didn’t wake up.

I got off the bed and almost laughed when I saw the way Pia was sleeping. Almost diagonally across the bed. No wonder, I didn’t have any place.

I stretched a little and then went down the stairs. My parents were early risers and they were already up and about.

“Goooooooood morning..” I said in a sing song voice.

“You look like you had a great time last night.” My mother smiled. I could tell she was really happy the way Pia and I had bonded.

“Uh-huh. Yep yep. We had a blast.”  I picked up my coffee and recounted our night to my mum and dad.

They smiled and laughed as I described each ride. I finished talking but they both were still looking at me. The unspoken question obvious on their faces.

“No..” I shook my head. “She slept before I could ask her.”

“What would you like for breakfast?” My mum asked suddenly. The question surprised me and I looked at her. She was looking straight through me. I turned around. Pia had just entered the room. She stood there rubbing her eyes.

“Good morning Pia!” I said in a cheerful voice.

Pia didn’t reply. She came towards me and clambered on to my lap. I put my arms around her and hugged her tightly.

I could imagine what was going on through my parent’s head. Pia used to do the same thing with my sister.

“What are you looking at?” Pia asked my parents, breaking the moment. I don’t think they realized that they were staring at us.

“You had a good time yesterday? ” My father asked her, trying to change the topic.

A wide smile broke across Pia’s face as she remembered last night.

“Yes!!” she exclaimed. “We had ice cream for dinner!!! And we..and we went for a movie!! And we went to a fair!! And we went on the roller coaster!!”

Pia  was talking nonstop and it was hard not to be affected by her excitement. Pretty soon, she had my parents hanging on to her every word.

 “We’ll all go together next time.. Won’t we Khushi??” Pia  turned around to face me. I couldn’t believe this was the same little girl I had met yesterday. Pia’s face was shining with happiness. If only I had come earlier, I could have saved her from being unhappy for so long.

“Are you ready for your surprise??” I had to ask her now, when she was in such a good mood.

“Surprise!!!!” Pia jumped off my lap and held out her hand as though expecting a gift.

I clutched her hand.

“Pia..” I began slowly.

“Where is it??” Impatience was a trait, she had inherited from my brother in law.

“Pia.. you are going to stay with me from now on!!” I put out my arms, waiting for her to react.

We all watched her expectantly.

“You are going to stay here with me?” Pia asked tentatively.

“No Pia..” I looked at my mother for support, this was going horribly wrong. My mum shook her head. This was between me and Pia.

“You are going to come stay with me.. you’ll like that right?” I was struggling with words.

Pia  took two steps back, looked at my parents and then back at me.

She uttered one word and then turned around and left.

“No..”

My Sister's Daughter - Chapter 7 - The Evening

Pia came looking for us eventually. She looked at us suspiciously as though she knew we were talking about her.

“What are you talking about?” She inquired.

“Its adult talk.” I told Pia same thing my mum used to tell us when we were little.

“I wanna know! I wanna know! I wanna know!” And that was the exact same thing that my sister and I used to tell my mum.

From my mother's smile, I could tell that she too was reminded of our childhood.

“Come Pia,” she said, walking out of the room “Its nothing important.”

Pia thought for a while and then deciding its not worth arguing about, ran to catch up with my mum. I followed them to the dining room.

In my family, everyone had their fixed places at the dining table. My mum sat at the head of the table, closest to the kitchen, my dad on her right, my sister to her left and I used to sit next to my dad. I subconsciously pulled out my usual chair.

“Thats my place!” Pia looked at me, dismayed that I had taken her place.

“Yours? Then where should I sit?”

“There..” Pia was pointing at my sister's chair.

I looked at Pia, wondering whether she was trying to imply something. Obviously not. She was just an eight years old who wanted her place.

I walked over to my sister's chair. My mum smiled at me encouragingly as I took my sister's place at the dining table.

Lunch was a boisterous affair with all of pretending to be normal. We all spoke a little louder and laughed a little harder as though trying to make up for the six months that we had lost.

Pia seemed oblivious to all our pretense. She didn't interact much, kept her head low and ate quietly. I wondered what had happened to her. She had been normal some time back.

I decided not to ask her.

After lunch Pia and I sat down to do her homework. As a child, I had always hated people who looked at me and said “Oh my god, she's grown so much.” It was almost as though they had expected me to shrink and I had grown up.

But now I understood what they had meant. Looking at Pia's books made me realize how quickly she was growing. Within no time, she had grown from a baby who couldn't even wipe her own nose to this child in front of me.

Kids grow up too darn fast. I remember my sister telling me that when she was inviting me to come stay with her for some time. You'll miss not being here for those moments Khushi.

After what seemed like eternity, Pia was done.

“Now what do we do?” Pia asked me.

“Well, don't you go to play now?”

“Nobody plays with me anymore.” I wanted to ask her why, but I didn't press her.

“Well, in that case.. lets go..” I picked up my jacket.

“Where?” Pia asked in surprise.

“You coming? Or not?”

“I'm coming!”

We both ran out of the house.

I had no idea where I was taking her. We hit the streets, walking aimlessly. We watched a movie and then went to a local fair. We went on all the rides possible. When we thoroughly exhausted ourselves with all the giggling, laughing, screaming and running around, we stopped and had ice cream for dinner. By the time we were in a cab, Pia was half asleep.

Once home, I carried Pia to her room. Her little arms were wrapped around my neck. I pulled off her shoes and tucked her in.

“Pia?” I asked gently.

Pia stirred in her sleep.

“Pia?” I asked again.

She opened one sleepy eye.

“Would you like to stay with me?”